Ecosexuality: A Course in the Arts of Conscious Loving
What's ecosexuality? Just a new buzz word for vegetarian with green bed sheets? A new sexual orientation to connect with a new-age dreamy date in a chat room? A new theory?
It is of course all of these--and none of them. In this course, we propose Ecosexuality as a new style in the arts of loving that is conscious of how important these arts are in process of making peace with humanitiy's hostess, the third planet Gaia.
Ecosexuality is a way of being sexual that's ecological, natural, balanced, amorous, exploring, playful, inclusive, adventurous, holistic, sacred, Gaian, erotic, considerate, consensual, responsible, and healthy, all simultaneously, separately, and in different proportions.
The emphasis in the course is on teaching styles of being amorous that are also ecological. Ecoloogy has to do with balance and proportion. For example, if a species reproduces excessively, the balance of an ecosystem is lost. But when all species are present in sustainable proportions, the ecosystem is healthy and whole.
There is an ecology to sexuality too. Many paths allow lovers and amorous people to access the ecstasy, the joy, the communion, the bliss of conscious erotic love. Some include 'natural' intermediaries: the ocean, the sky, the moon, mountains, lakes, rivers have all been known to inspire lovers to ecstatic bliss. Other intermediaries are more 'human made': the arts, poetry, scents, foods, wines, jacuzzis, watsu pools, leather, silk, floggers, film, fetishes, videos, sex toys, and a whole assortment of other aphrodisiacs inspire people to become amorous in a variety of sexual ways and paths to erotic ecstasy. The contemplation of other people in love and the feeling of inclusiveness that emanates therein can be a powerful erotic inspiration too.
We believe that love is an art that can be learned consciously. We do not make conclusive statements on that the 'nature' of human love can be. However, we affirm that every person has a very special talent to love. The intent of the course is to nurture that talent into an artistic form that graces the person and his/her amorous communities with an abundant healthy dosage of the arts of loving.
We propose a wide sampling of these arts, including elements of meditation, touch, sensuality, cuddling, massage, pleasuring, self-pleasuring, communication, mirroring, witnessing, compersion, polyamory, bi-sensuality, sexual play, bonding and domination, fetishism, sexual play, tantra, and more. These practices are taught as styles of amorous expression that help participants develop their talents as artists of love.
The encouragement is for students to become better resources of love for their communities. We do not encourage the formation of identities around any of these practices more than any other. Any combination of them that develops the amorous talents of participants is ecosexual to the extent that it makes the world more abundant with resources of conscious love.
This course is a work in progress. So far, the main areas are:
Compersion: The Spirit of Polyamory
Fluid Bonding and the Health/Safety of Erotic Communities
The Pleasure of the Other: Becoming a Resource of Love
Flogassage: The Bioenergetics of Multiple Loves
Developed by Serena Anderlini-D'Onofrio, PhD, for the intellectual property of 3WayKiss
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Workshop 1 - Compersion: The Spirit of Polyamory
Workshop 1 - Compersion: The Spirit of Polyamory
In the wisdom of love, we understand that the arts of loving can save Gaia, the live planet, because they are part of the arts of healing. A key concept in these arts is compersion, which comes from polyamory and is often understood as 'the opposite of jealousy.' Compersion is the joy of sharing the amorous resources that bless our lives. It is the bliss of witnessing the love our partners receive from others than ourselves. Jealousy often registers as a humiliating emotion. How can this emotion transform into joy? The 2 1/2 hour workshop is designed to teach this transformation in a series of small-group exercises that impact our inner and outer landscapes. Compersion, the spirit of polyamory, is a vibration that animates our bodies with joy and participation, once we become familiar with the bioenergetics of this inclusive, liberating emotion.
Serena Anderlini-D'Onofrio, PhD, is a professor of humanities at the University of Puerto Rico, Mayaguez. She is the author of Eros: A Journey of Multiple Loves, and the editor of numerous collections. She teaches courses, workshops, and seminars on the practice of love and the science of Gaia.
Scheduled for July 8, 2010, in Bellingham, WA
Contact: Laya Shriaberg, laya@spiralsun.com
In the wisdom of love, we understand that the arts of loving can save Gaia, the live planet, because they are part of the arts of healing. A key concept in these arts is compersion, which comes from polyamory and is often understood as 'the opposite of jealousy.' Compersion is the joy of sharing the amorous resources that bless our lives. It is the bliss of witnessing the love our partners receive from others than ourselves. Jealousy often registers as a humiliating emotion. How can this emotion transform into joy? The 2 1/2 hour workshop is designed to teach this transformation in a series of small-group exercises that impact our inner and outer landscapes. Compersion, the spirit of polyamory, is a vibration that animates our bodies with joy and participation, once we become familiar with the bioenergetics of this inclusive, liberating emotion.
Serena Anderlini-D'Onofrio, PhD, is a professor of humanities at the University of Puerto Rico, Mayaguez. She is the author of Eros: A Journey of Multiple Loves, and the editor of numerous collections. She teaches courses, workshops, and seminars on the practice of love and the science of Gaia.
Scheduled for July 8, 2010, in Bellingham, WA
Contact: Laya Shriaberg, laya@spiralsun.com
Workshop 2 - Fluid Bonding and the Health/Safety of Erotic Communities
Workshop 2 - Fluid Bonding and the Health/Safety of Erotic Communities
This workshop discusses how changes to fluid-bonding agreements can impact individuals in an erotic community, the community’s notification and negotiation processes, screening protocols, and reactions to disease outbreaks and breaches in agreement. A general introduction to the topic will be followed by open discussion, with a few anecdotes to break the ice if necessary.
Why is the practice of safer sex important to an erotic community?
The protection of each participant is proportional to the health of the community. In practicing safer sex, a participant in an erotic community protects other participants from pathogens that might be inadvertently stored in this participant’s body. Physical safety is conducive of emotional safety too.
Fluid-bonding is the practice of exchanging deep and not-so-deep body fluids with sexual and erotic partners, and the emotional bonding that this implies. On the pair level, fluid bonding can be viewed as a trading of risk for pleasure and intimacy. In a given erotic community, it is more complicated; there are implications, both positive and negative, to each participant and to the community as a whole. In general, one might say that fluid bonding contributes to the health of a community to the extent that it is based on rules that are defined quite explicitly and followed quite closely.
Workshop Design by Serena Anderlini and Murray Schechter
This workshop discusses how changes to fluid-bonding agreements can impact individuals in an erotic community, the community’s notification and negotiation processes, screening protocols, and reactions to disease outbreaks and breaches in agreement. A general introduction to the topic will be followed by open discussion, with a few anecdotes to break the ice if necessary.
Why is the practice of safer sex important to an erotic community?
The protection of each participant is proportional to the health of the community. In practicing safer sex, a participant in an erotic community protects other participants from pathogens that might be inadvertently stored in this participant’s body. Physical safety is conducive of emotional safety too.
Fluid-bonding is the practice of exchanging deep and not-so-deep body fluids with sexual and erotic partners, and the emotional bonding that this implies. On the pair level, fluid bonding can be viewed as a trading of risk for pleasure and intimacy. In a given erotic community, it is more complicated; there are implications, both positive and negative, to each participant and to the community as a whole. In general, one might say that fluid bonding contributes to the health of a community to the extent that it is based on rules that are defined quite explicitly and followed quite closely.
Workshop Design by Serena Anderlini and Murray Schechter
Workshop 3 - The Pleasure of the Other: Becoming a Resource for Love
Workshop 3 - The Pleasure of the Other: Becoming a Resource for Love
The ecstasy our lovers feel is proportional to our ability to experience it as our own pleasure. When we get to access this experience our education in the arts of loving can be considered complete. As artists of love, we will be the source of erotic ecstasy for our lovers in such sublime communion that the pleasure of the other will become our own.
As a principle of erotic/ecstatic communion, the pleasure of the other is not new. We can read about it in Sappho, Ovid, Veronica Franco, Giacomo Casanova, and others whose love lives have been celebrated in literature. But how can we learn to generate this pleasure in our own love lives? This workshop is designed to provide access to this experience.
The exercise intends to initiate participants in the practice of forming a pleasure team and receiving pleasure from multiple sources. It can be done in a conventional or clothing-optional environment. Participants form groups of 5 to 7 people and sit on the floor in a circle. One participant volunteers to be the ‘pleasure emitter,’ the others form the ‘pleasure team.’ The ‘pleasure emitter’ lies down at the center while members of the ‘pleasure team’ sit around in a circle. Boundaries are set as to what areas of the ‘pleasure emitter’s’ body are open for receiving pleasure and what areas are off limits. The pleasure team begins to focus on pleasuring the emitter. Members will stay tuned into each other and listen for signs of pleasure from the emitter. The emitter will express pleasure with words, moans, and body movements. These will reverberate as feed back with the team whose members will enhance the pleasure as they respond to the expressions of the emitter.
The exercise can be repeated as many times as there are volunteer pleasure emitters in the group. Each round lasts about 10-15 minutes. After two or three rounds, the group will discuss the experience. Participants will share about what it felt like to be in either position and why. What did participants learn about pleasure? Is the pleasure of the other better than our own?
A group hug can be used as a closing ritual.
A workshop designed by Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio, PhD
The ecstasy our lovers feel is proportional to our ability to experience it as our own pleasure. When we get to access this experience our education in the arts of loving can be considered complete. As artists of love, we will be the source of erotic ecstasy for our lovers in such sublime communion that the pleasure of the other will become our own.
As a principle of erotic/ecstatic communion, the pleasure of the other is not new. We can read about it in Sappho, Ovid, Veronica Franco, Giacomo Casanova, and others whose love lives have been celebrated in literature. But how can we learn to generate this pleasure in our own love lives? This workshop is designed to provide access to this experience.
The exercise intends to initiate participants in the practice of forming a pleasure team and receiving pleasure from multiple sources. It can be done in a conventional or clothing-optional environment. Participants form groups of 5 to 7 people and sit on the floor in a circle. One participant volunteers to be the ‘pleasure emitter,’ the others form the ‘pleasure team.’ The ‘pleasure emitter’ lies down at the center while members of the ‘pleasure team’ sit around in a circle. Boundaries are set as to what areas of the ‘pleasure emitter’s’ body are open for receiving pleasure and what areas are off limits. The pleasure team begins to focus on pleasuring the emitter. Members will stay tuned into each other and listen for signs of pleasure from the emitter. The emitter will express pleasure with words, moans, and body movements. These will reverberate as feed back with the team whose members will enhance the pleasure as they respond to the expressions of the emitter.
The exercise can be repeated as many times as there are volunteer pleasure emitters in the group. Each round lasts about 10-15 minutes. After two or three rounds, the group will discuss the experience. Participants will share about what it felt like to be in either position and why. What did participants learn about pleasure? Is the pleasure of the other better than our own?
A group hug can be used as a closing ritual.
A workshop designed by Serena Anderlini-D’Onofrio, PhD
Workshop 4 - Flogassage: The Bioenergetics of Multiple Loves
Workshop 4 - Flogassage: The Bioenergetics of Multiple Loves
Learning the Arts of Loving with Serena Anderlini-D'Onofrio
This workshop combines small group massage and mild flogging to convey the bio-energetic experience of polyamory compersion, tantric energy and kundalini, and love for the person.
Compersion is the ability to share love among three or more people. Practicing compersion helps to transmute jealousy into the joy and elation of being present to multiple loves, to give up exclusivity, and to express pleasure and ecstasy (or being the “pleasure emitter” in a multipartnering situation
Tantric Energy & Kundalini are modes of amorous expression that enable one to give, receive, store, and transmute erotic energy throughout the body and the chakra system. These modes are often experienced indirectly. In this workshop we focus on the back side of the body as a place to store and transmute these energies.
Love for the person is the ability to love someone independently of their gender and sexual orientation. Many experienced bisexuals practice this kind of love. In this workshop we focus on changing roles within a small group, exchanging erotic energy with diverse participants, adjusting degrees of participation, and experiencing full-body erotic pleasure, to convey the experience of loving the person.
"I was fortunate to attend a flogassage organized by Serena. It was not on the agenda for the weekend, but was one of the highlights of my experience. Serena expertly set the mood and our expectations, then smoothly guided us through hours of sensual touch experiences unlike anything I had ever experienced before. She is truly gifted," said Michael from Massachusetts.
Notes:
This workshop is open to everyone over 18.
It is especially recommended for massage therapists and other kinds of holistic healers interested in exploring the sensual aspects of the healing arts.
The workshop will be held in a clothing optional environment.
Participation in the exercises is based on consent. Graded levels of participation are encouraged.
Learning the Arts of Loving with Serena Anderlini-D'Onofrio
This workshop combines small group massage and mild flogging to convey the bio-energetic experience of polyamory compersion, tantric energy and kundalini, and love for the person.
Compersion is the ability to share love among three or more people. Practicing compersion helps to transmute jealousy into the joy and elation of being present to multiple loves, to give up exclusivity, and to express pleasure and ecstasy (or being the “pleasure emitter” in a multipartnering situation
Tantric Energy & Kundalini are modes of amorous expression that enable one to give, receive, store, and transmute erotic energy throughout the body and the chakra system. These modes are often experienced indirectly. In this workshop we focus on the back side of the body as a place to store and transmute these energies.
Love for the person is the ability to love someone independently of their gender and sexual orientation. Many experienced bisexuals practice this kind of love. In this workshop we focus on changing roles within a small group, exchanging erotic energy with diverse participants, adjusting degrees of participation, and experiencing full-body erotic pleasure, to convey the experience of loving the person.
"I was fortunate to attend a flogassage organized by Serena. It was not on the agenda for the weekend, but was one of the highlights of my experience. Serena expertly set the mood and our expectations, then smoothly guided us through hours of sensual touch experiences unlike anything I had ever experienced before. She is truly gifted," said Michael from Massachusetts.
Notes:
This workshop is open to everyone over 18.
It is especially recommended for massage therapists and other kinds of holistic healers interested in exploring the sensual aspects of the healing arts.
The workshop will be held in a clothing optional environment.
Participation in the exercises is based on consent. Graded levels of participation are encouraged.
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
Workshop 5 - Bisexuality, Self-Knowledge, and Eros
Workshop
Bisexuality, Self-Knowledge, and Eros
This workshop is designed to assist participants in becoming more aware of how bisexual cultures and lovestyles complement and integrate with Polyamory.
We open with a short poem about bisexuality by nonetheless that William Shakespeare. "Two loves I have," from Sonnet 144. There is nothing new to bisexuality or Polyamory, since even the bard practiced them . . .We continue with definitions and historical perspectives about the bisexual movement, especially in the late 20th century, with a special reference to the work of the late Fritz Klein, from a psychoanalytical perspective, and Lani Kaahumanu and Loraine Hutchins, from a cultural and earth-centered perspective. Participants will be invited to share in small groups about bisexual dreams, wishes, fantasies, and experiences.
Next will be a practical exercise based on the Klein Grid, a bi version of the Kinsley Scale. Participants will be invited to place themselves on this grid. Then they will mix and mingle while they ask questions of each other as to where they best fit, so that in the end everyone will stand on the floor in correspondence to their place on the grid, to everyone’s amusement! 
Bisexuality is largely in the mind of the beholder. Participants will play the roles of givers and receivers in small groups. The messages will be expressed via soft touch and/or flirtatious gazing. The givers will keep their intention secret, and the receiver will be invited to guess as to what that is. In many cases, a non-sexual intention will be interpreted as sexual, and vice versa, to the amusement of all.Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Giving Ecosexual Thanks on the Day of Accion de Gracias
Oh well, you must have been wondering why we rushed to post this video without the slightest comment. It's so cute! It's really about persona, private life here in Western Puerto Rico, and how we really make it nice and cozy with our close friends. There is a certain intimacy that comes with living on an island where almost everyone knows after a bit. Here we are with our friends David and Javier in Ponce, ciudad senoral, which actually means town of distinguished, well-to-do people, and it really is, with its large avenues and southern tranquility. They invited us for a vegetarian Tanksgiving dinner, can you imagine: no turkey! They had prepared the most exquisite meal, served on the indoor patio on a cool evening. How cheerful!
We are so late posting comments to this because we were involved in a tech upgrade which turned out to be very efficient but made things a bit confused during the transition. Yours truly had been told that her computer skills and multiple systems deserved a Mac. And she got it! Oh technology, let me be slave to Thee! It is a good system and we are enjoying its efficiency.
Thanks to all the geeks who suggested the switch!
And a belated Buen Dia de Accion de Gracias to you!
We are so late posting comments to this because we were involved in a tech upgrade which turned out to be very efficient but made things a bit confused during the transition. Yours truly had been told that her computer skills and multiple systems deserved a Mac. And she got it! Oh technology, let me be slave to Thee! It is a good system and we are enjoying its efficiency.
Thanks to all the geeks who suggested the switch!
And a belated Buen Dia de Accion de Gracias to you!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)